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“I spend an insane amount of time wondering if I’m doing it right. At some point, I just remind myself that I’m doing my best. That is enough.” ~Myleik Teele
Does this sound like you? Perfectionism is an obsession in our society right now. So, what is perfect? One definition of perfect is this – without any flaws, defects, or shortcomings. I tend to see a lot of people approach learning with this attitude – I can’t make any mistakes and allow anyone to see me being less than perfect. Although when I ask whether or not perfection exists, they say no. "I must give my all" isn’t really a bad thing but when having to give your all means being perfect, and there’s no such thing as perfect, it can turn into… I may as well do nothing. At least if I do nothing, I haven’t really failed and I won’t feel embarrassed or humiliated.
So, why this push to be something we can't be?
Because perfection doesn’t exist, it sets us up for failure every time. From that perspective, it certainly makes sense why you’d want to do nothing versus failing every single time. Once in a while you see glimmers of what is perceived as perfection. Those glimmers continue to keep you holding on for hope. If I just do this one thing…I’ll get there, I can be perfect. The problem is, the one thing never leads to perfection… Because there is no perfection.
HOW TO DEAL WITH PERFECTIONISTIC TENDENCIES
So, why this push to be something we can't be?
Because perfection doesn’t exist, it sets us up for failure every time. From that perspective, it certainly makes sense why you’d want to do nothing versus failing every single time. Once in a while you see glimmers of what is perceived as perfection. Those glimmers continue to keep you holding on for hope. If I just do this one thing…I’ll get there, I can be perfect. The problem is, the one thing never leads to perfection… Because there is no perfection.
HOW TO DEAL WITH PERFECTIONISTIC TENDENCIES
- Learn to embrace mistakes – know that mistakes will help you grow.
- Feel good about a win – winning feels good and should be celebrated, but having a win doesn't mean every practice will be a step forward. Celebrate then refocus so you are present for the next challenge.
- Find 1-2 things that you did in a practice that are positive – Beginning to point out the positive things will help motivate you and give you confidence.
MISTAKES HAPPEN. MISTAKES ARE HEALTHY.
There really is no such thing as perfect but there’s something better than that! What is it? Realizing there’s no such thing. Learning to be ok with doing your best (whatever that is at any given moment) and allowing yourself to be human. Just do your best. Be your best. That means what you have the ability to be.
Being present in the process will allow you to do what you want to do. Mistakes will still happen but they are so incredibly important for growth. Here’s my challenge to you – instead of trying to be perfect, try to find another way to appreciate the positive things and deal with mistakes in a healthier way. I'll leave you to think about this quote: "If I am not failing regularly, I am living so far below my potential that I am failing anyway".
My honey pot colouring here is from our Mini Colouring Class Bundle 6 which you can find in the store here! It includes instructions for both markers and pencils - love to have you join in and thank you for reading this week's art therapy post! :)
Hi everyone! Have you been checking in each week for our follower freebie? It's free for absolutely everyone and a new one goes up each Saturday. Be quick! If you miss it, you can't go back to claim. You can find them anytime via the banner on the homepage of the website, or the EVENTS tab in our Facebook community. Grab it now!
Plus our next Vintage Class Re-release is here! Grab 40% off our Tropic Paradise 2019 classes here: markers and pencils GREAT for beginners as I break down all of the very basics + you'll receive lifetime access to do them at your own pace!
Techniques covered include: tropical flowers and leaves, birds, feathers, creating depth in white and yellow animals, rainbow effects, orchids, hibiscus, and more! Plus FREE images included!
If you are new to Kit and Clowder, every month I re-release a retired "Vintage Class" for sale from our 2015-early 2020 vault so you can learn some of the past techniques we've already tackled. Be quick - these classes will only be available for sale until March 31.
Happy colouring everyone and make sure you share your work with us over in our Facebook community! :)
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| *Dragon Colouring Class from our Mini Bundle 3 at www.kitandclowder.com/shop |
Hi everyone! I wanted to chat about the learning process this week - it's something that comes up regularly where people are feeling nervous to get started, or not good enough to keep going when they inevitably make a mistake.
I'm sure we can all agree that we are our own harshest critics. It’s easy to tell ourselves that “it’s not perfect”, or “I’m not good enough”. The biggest thing that can stop you from achieving is not how good you are right this moment, how fast you colour, or how many supplies you have...it’s your inner critic, that inner voice that controls how you speak to yourself about trying new challenges and whether your work is good enough. What we don’t realise is that every time we judge ourselves + compare with others, we are dampening our motivation, making it feel that little bit more challenging and overwhelming than it really is, and turning our dreams into chores. The good news? You have the power to slowly change how you speak to yourself and feel about your work.
If you are in one of our classes, or been sitting on the sidelines, and a bit nervous to jump in, remember that a class is not a test in how good you are, it’s a learning tool to help you to get there. The key to taking that next step, whether it is for colouring or anything else, is just to take any pressure, expectations, or comparisons off. It actually doesn’t matter at all how your colouring turned out today, whether it is “perfect” or not. What matters are the lessons you are taking away every time you try, the mistakes that you *will* make - they mean you *aren’t* a failure because you are putting yourself out there, you are challenging what you know to help yourself become better for tomorrow.
So if you've been afraid to jump in, tell yourself right now that you *can* do this, that each and every time you try you will be one step closer to your goals, but you don’t have to get there all in one day or one lesson. Actually saying the words out loud can help reinforce the power behind them (sounds silly but it truly works). It's not always easy to remember this and it takes dedicated practice, just like your colouring does, so save posts like this and reminders to yourself that you are good enough. Appreciate where you are at right now in your journey and enjoy every practice and step forward, mistakes and all ❤
Happy Colouring this week everyone - if you are looking for something fun to colour, why not grab this free stamp that's available for everyone over in our Kit and Clowder Colouring Facebook Group :)
Alyce x
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This lesson is just as important as learning about the colouring itself.
In our Facebook Group, I get to see a lot of people sharing their colouring and read a lot of comments about how we each perceive our own work. Sadly, I read all too often the comments where we don't think we are good enough, as good as others, or that we've made a mistake, rather than appreciating the progress we are making and how we are each growing on our own path, in our own time.
How we speak to ourselves and about our work directly influences our motivation and ability to learn. Even though you might not realise, negatively speaking about your work constantly is not constructive - this is so harmful to our confidence as if you do this regularly you are just enforcing to yourself that you "aren't good enough" or have failed on a task. We need to enjoy just colouring and learning new things without being so caught up on what the end result is like - that is counter productive to learning and we forget the fun is in the process, the making mistakes, the achievements that come after learning - not in holding a pretty colouring at the end. Take the pressure off and let yourself know you are doing a good job - you are growing just by trying
<3 and the more we try, the quicker we will get to the results we want.. but it doesn't have to be today. So let's look at how we talk about our work so we feel encouraged to continue learning on our journey to grow.
CRITIQUE STEP 1 - CHANGE YOUR PERSPECTIVE
So let's talk about how we critique our work, which is usually first done when we assess our work ourselves. Firstly, it's important not to judge a half finished technique - it's always going to look a little wrong or stand out to you until your entire piece is finished. Resist that urge to keep restarting - it's not doing you any favours in learning and progressing with your colouring. If you are really unsure though, pop a message and photo over to me so we can chat about the next steps.
Secondly comes how we speak about our work. When you've finished your colouring, take a step back and look at your entire piece - not just upclose looking for mistakes. Changing our perspective to appreciate our work as a whole allows you to have a greater understanding of how techniques come together to create a finished piece, and allows little mistakes that no one is looking at, fade into the background.
CRITIQUE STEP 2 - POSITIVE TALK
Then the wording we use when we look at our work is very important. Firstly we need to take the time to point out what we've done *right* - it's a step that is missed so often but it is crucial in critique, confidence, and motivation. I guarantee on every single colouring there is a lot of good that deserves celebrating. Try pointing out two things you feel you've done well or improved upon from last time - it shows you that you are learning and achieving each time you colour. When you share your colouring online, consider sharing these two things and notice how people's opinion of your work changes - we celebrate your achievements with you which is so much more uplifting than others looking for the mistakes you have just pointed out to them
:) CRITIQUE STEP 3 - HOW TO HANDLE MISTAKES
We are *all* going to make mistakes when we colour. It's the nature of learning new things and they should be embraced as they mean you are learning and growing - in fact, we can't learn without them. We need to face these constructively instead of negatively so we still feel motivated when we make a mistake. A good way to do this is to point out what you could try differently next time to get a different result - eg. Instead of "I messed up the wings", try something like "next time I'm going to work on leaving more gaps between my strokes to emphasise texture". It takes away that negative emotion so you haven't done anything "wrong"- but you are still needing practice on your colouring journey (as we all do).
This should be done privately or with myself as you are keeping these growth lessons your personal achievements. All of a sudden you have taken what you felt was a negative attempt at colouring and made it a positive step forward - showing you that every single time you colour you are improving and learning and it is important to have these challenges to learn from.
Don't let fear of making mistakes stand in your way of learning - Be afraid of never trying and being exactly where you are now next year as this is the time you cannot grow. Achievements require first a challenge in all areas of life so don't deny your chance to be challenged because you might make a mistake or you feel nervous. Colouring is not about comparing with anyone else (that includes your classes) but is instead about where you are on your journey only and how you are growing each time you take that challenge - take the time to let yourself know how well you are doing just by jumping in.
Don't lose the love of your hobby through putting pressure on yourselves or being nervous about making mistakes - you "can" do this...it's time to start believing in yourself just like I believe in you xx
ps. A little colouring from me today - I've been working on this cute image from Lee Holland and practicing my black hair with Prismacolor Pencils. If you want to learn with me, check out our colouring classes at www.kitandclowder.com :)
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Do you ever think that an image or a lesson looks too hard for you? Or have you tried something and found it was tricky, so put it aside? This is fear of failure talking and today I want to look at ways to move past this so you can have the most enjoyment with your colouring :)
We all want to learn more about colouring right? So why do we allow ourselves not to join in when it is something we want to do? First things first, you aren't alone in feeling this way. Most of us feel nervous to try new things (even me too!) - that is totally normal as we are moving outside of our comfort zones. But it's what you do next that takes you from being on the outside just looking, to being someone who is growing and always improving in their colouring.
The most important step to overcoming fear of failure is to take action.
Don't ever wait for the perfect moment as it may not be coming... just jump in, even if you feel nervous. When you feel that self-doubt creeping in, acknowledge it, feel it, then tell it "not today" because you have some colouring to do :) Setting goals can really help aswell - aim not for perfection but for learning something new... this way, if we are joining in, we can never fail as we are always moving forward. A mistake never equals backwards.. it equals learning opportunities which helps us go forward.
If you have put off a lesson because you felt like you weren't good enough, I want you to know you *can* do this and I'm right here by your side to help. When it feels scary or it isn't working, don't just put it aside, hop on facebook, open your private messages, and send me one. I'm here to help you so that you can progress on your colouring journey and feel the most confident - so please make sure you use the help that is available :)
I hope you will make some time this weekend to try something you have been putting off - we are all here cheering you on. Don't forget to check out our free Markers 101 class if you haven't yet, and I'd love to see you in our other classes aswell over at www.kitandclowder.com
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Hi everyone! I'm popping in with my latest make for Live and Love Crafts :) I've again used the new Maja Designs papers - can't get enough of them! I have coloured up Tweetie Pie from The Greeting Farm using my Prismacolor Pencils :)
With the chipboard frame here, I dabbed it with Walnut Stain Distress Ink and then sprinkled Frantage on top. The Frantage is heated with an embossing gun so it melts in speckles.
If you've like to learn more about colouring with pencils, don't forget to pop over and visit our Online Colouring Classes here :)
I hope you've enjoyed my project! Thanks for stopping by!
