Kit and Clowder Online Colouring Classes

This is the most important post you will read all day! Please take 2 minutes to read + leave your thoughts in the comments below!

I'm sure we can all agree that we are our harshest critiques  But what do we do when we put all of the pressure on ourselves and end up sucking out the joy from the learning process? Our words can directly influence whether we are motivated to keep learning or whether we give up because we think it's too hard and we aren't doing a good enough job. Keep in mind there's no benchmark when learning, no one standing over us telling us we must be perfect, no scorecard or timeline we have to learn everything by. All of that is coming from ourselves, inside. One of the most powerful things I heard about our inner speech that has stuck with me is when you find yourself saying it's too hard, or I can never do this, or it's not good enough is not to change the activity.. the activity is not the one at fault - our attitude is  If you can learn to stop those thoughts and reframe them then you can take on anything you want to in life - changing your attitude changes your whole experience 

So let's have a chat about how to do that when we are feeling down about our work!

STEP 1 - CHANGE YOUR PERSPECTIVE 
So let's talk about how we critique our work - this is when we do some colouring, then we step back and look at how well we think we are doing. Firstly, it's important not to judge a half finished technique - it's always going to look a little wrong or stand out to you until your entire piece is finished. Resist that urge to keep restarting - it's not doing you any favours in learning and progressing with your colouring. If you are really unsure though, don't forget our classes always come with free private, one on one tutoring, so pop a photo over and we can chat about the next steps to help you feel more confident. Remember self-learning is such a small part of really mastering techniques - getting advice, non-emotional feedback, and tips on how to grow from people who have done it before is just as powerful as actually learning the steps. Don't be afraid to use this help - it will get you there faster and smarter.
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Secondly comes how we speak about our work. When you've finished your colouring, or viewing during the process, change your perspective so you aren't looking in that upclose mode we use for colouring, 20 cm from our work. This is not how art is meant to be viewed. Hold your colouring at arms length, prop against a wall and take an actual step back - try to view the whole picture rather than just looking upclose for mistakes and errors. Try to train your eye to see the whole project like as if you were viewing a friend's colouring - don't point out to yourself the areas you don't love just yet. Changing our perspective to appreciate our work as a whole allows you to have a greater understanding of how techniques come together to create a finished piece, and allows little mistakes that no one is looking at, fade into the background.

STEP 2 - POSITIVE TALK FIRST

The wording we use when we first look at our work is very important. Firstly we need to take the time to point out what we've done *right* - it's a step that is missed so often but it is crucial in critique, confidence, and motivation. I guarantee on every single colouring there is a lot of good, and that you've learned some new skills or refined some you've already had. that deserves celebrating. Try pointing out two things you feel you've done well or improved upon from last time - it shows you that you are learning and achieving each time you colour. Consider actually writing it down or saying it aloud - this gives the words more weight (sounds silly but it really works - it's proven that we accept things more when it's concrete through being spoken or written). When you share your colouring online, consider sharing these two things instead of just saying it's not perfect or pointing our what you feel isn't right, and notice how people's opinion of your work changes - we celebrate your achievements with you, but we look for mistakes if you point them out  It's so much more empowering to acknowledge the growth you are having with every piece, and a piece doesn't need to be perfect for there to have been a good lesson involved.

STEP 3 - HOW TO HANDLE MISTAKES OR WHEN YOU DON'T LOVE THE FINISHED RESULT

You don't have to be inauthentically positive though - we learn from mistakes, but it's important that we aren't *negative* when looking at them. There's nothing *wrong* with a mistake - you haven't stuffed up, it's not "not perfect" - it's simply a learning opportunity. Take the emotion out of your critique and focus on what you could try differently, on the lesson, instead of the negative emotion behind it . eg. Instead of "I messed up the wings", "my fine lines are a mess", or "it's not perfect but...." try something like "next time I'm going to work on xxx to achieve xxx result". So this may read something like: I "next time I'm going to work on leaving more gaps between my strokes to emphasise texture". Notice that you've taken away that negative emotion so you haven't done anything "wrong"- but you are still learning on your colouring journey (as we all do).
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A lot of people say they learn best from critique - but as you can see, there's a difference between saying something is not good enough and just reminding yourself that it's all a learning journey. There's no need with your Ego to interfere here - Ego is your expectation of yourself - and we need to train our ego to understand that it's unrealistic to expect to be perfect with our first efforts. The more we expect of ourselves, the more likely we are to have the true failure - giving up. The only time we fail is when we put something aside as you can't improve upon nothing - so work on taking away the pressure and emotion associated with creating and learning... it is just a fun activity with no pressure, no requirement to be perfect, and no expectation  And remember, you aren't competing with the class sample or anyone else you may see sharing online. We all have different amounts of practice that you aren't seeing in the background - focus on your own growth, not that of others. Don't let that ego tell you you should be any further along than where you are right now - where you are is perfect.

STEP 4 - MAKE THIS PART OF YOUR ROUTINE 

If you struggle with perfectionism or low confidence, try using a journal to record these steps so you can make this a part of your learning process. It will also help you log your colouring progress, helping you to easily flick back and see over time how you have progressed. Anytime you feel frustration flare up, pull yourself back to these steps and take the emotion out of it. Take three deep breaths and ask yourself - what have I learned from the mistake? What have I done well? Will it look different at the end? How can I improve upon this for next time? The more you train your mind to run through these questions, the more it will become second nature and help you not only in your colouring but in every day life aswell 

I hope this may help some of you to assess the way you speak to yourself about your work. Don't let fear of mistakes or the pressures you place on yourself stand in your way of actually learning and enjoying your hobbies. You aren't in a competition with anyone, there's no need to rush to learn it all, and no need to give up on yourself if you dont'quite get there with today's practice. And always remember - you don't have to be great to start, but you do have to start to be great  

In our latest we are touching on the importance of Patience; why it's important, how to have patience with your art, and how this impacts mindfulness to reduce worry and anxiety. I wanted to do a little writeup on this lesson for you to save and refer to, so let's have a chat about this very important skill (and notice I say skill - it's something that most of us must practice to really learn, just like our colouring).

You may have heard about Mindfulness before - we talk about it a lot here. Mindfulness is about being able to be in the present moment, to focus on the task you are doing wholly which helps you let go of any worries about the past or future. This allows you to let go of any feelings of anxiety and just focus on what is in front of you at the present moment,and it's actually a skill that can help you not only destress and take a step back, but it helps you to deal with stressful situations with a clearer mind.

Mindfulness activities often involve a level of instruction and challenge, and this is what helps to occupy your mind more fully than a relaxation task - you are forced to disconnect from some of the pressures of life going on around you to focus on that task you are doing. Your colouring classes here are a good example of a mindful task, so you can see why doing something like can be helpful when you are overwhelmed.. even when you feel like you don't have time. It's just about taking a break, even for just 10 minutes, so you can take a little breather to focus on you, to gain back a bit of control, and to destress.

However, mindfulness takes practice and when we are really stressed or emotionally exhausted, it's very easy to fall out of mindfulness because those worries creep up on you and take over your thoughts and how you are feeling - they distract you from the task you are working on. When you think about, or when you are doing your mindful activity, like your colouring, you may encounter discomfort, pain, numbness, fear, all of those overwhelming emotions that you may be feeling about other things can manifest into your mindful activity. Or, you may even feel restless, like you can't focus on the task in front of you, and you keep jumping from one thing to the next. Or, you may find memories that you've been suppressing come to the surface - your mind is wandering and bringing up other things to think about. All of these things can lead to frustration, disappointment, and make you want to stop your "you time" activity, or even whatever it is you are doing - chores, work.. you may want to get up and just do something else as a distraction (which leads to procrastination).

What this can actually mean is you may lack patience in your mindfulness. What really is patience? Patience is what allows us to pause and accept a situation for what it is. It allows us to accept our emotions and reactions without judging ourselves for them. So, we know that mindfulness is being aware of the present moment without judging it, but our emotions can be very habitual and arise quickly - it takes patience to stop and step back from your initial reactions. If you can apply patience to mindfulness, you give yourself a chance to gain a broader perspective of what's happening so you be a bit more deliberate and present with what you are doing. It allows you to act or not to act as you choose - it helps you gain that self-control over your emotions. It is simply the absence of automatic reaction, which allows you a better, wider perspective from which to act, or not act, as you choose.

Art Therapy Exercise: 

You can also try this in every day life when something creates a negative reaction within you; pause, take a breath, let it out slowly and quietly. Observe whether this brief pause allows you to avoid a reaction in favour of a conscious choice of action. Practice patience with your emotions. Again, this does take practice and it's not always easy, but being aware of this and practicing this can help you start ingraining it in your mind. So when you do your colouring, focus on the present moment and just think of the lessons you are learning and taking away. Remember, priotising you in times of stress is not about the colouring, it's about giving you that emotional break to step back, recharge, destress, and gain that control back. It helps you with your work, your chores, better taking care of family, better interact with others... it filters through into every path of your life. And this is why taking these mindful breaks are so important - it's not about the colouring at the end of the day, it's your concious choice to take a break to be a better you 

Hope you've found this helpful, if you'd like some more art therapy tips, please check out our free Mindful Me Colouring Class over at www.kitandclowder.com via the Class Rooms tab. 

Art Therapy Post: Are Mistakes Necessary?

I want you to read this quote and really think about it's meaning. We can be so quick to give up on the things that we aren't instant masters in, the things that challenge us, the things that push us out of our comfort zones. Not one single person became a master in any skill or occupation overnight. Their journey was not a straight path of successes. They made mistakes, they had ups and downs, they had to fail.. in order to succeed.

Stop defining your success by your ability to master something, and instead define it by having the courage to start, by looking at your growth each time you try, by comparing only with yourself. When you can let the pressure go, you can focus on the process of learning and of creating bringing you the joy, fulfilment, and achievement you are looking for. Your process and progress is your achievement, not a finished product at the end. So it's time to ditch the attitude of perfect = success, and instead remember that the ups and downs are what give us our achievements <3 Embrace every single challenge because it is making you not only a better colourist, but a better you <3 dds